When one has compassion or pity for someone, one is usually aware of his shortcomings as well.
It is even maintained that the more one is aware of the faults of the person for whom one has compassion, the more intense the emotion.
Thus, instead of causing repulsion, this compassion can augment the attraction and cancel out the hate.
In other words, if one has pity, it is almost impossible to hate.
And it is very likely that love will be aroused.
In this case, one no longer sees the shortcomings that started the whole process, and love can take root and grow.
–Rabbi Adin Steinsaltz